Introducing Muni Mind Reader
Allow us to introduce Tiffany Maleshefski, the Amazing Muni Mind Reader! This is the first in our new series where Tiffany will channel the thoughts of a Muni rider directly onto our pages. Ever wonder what your fellow passengers are thinking as we stare at one another during yet another bumpy Muni ride? Tiffany’s got you covered. In today’s installment, Tiffany’s onto that guy who takes up two seats on the bus.
Hey lady,
What do you want from me? I’m a guy. Yeah, a big honkin’ guy, and that’s why I just gotta sit here next to you with my legs spread wide apart because I have this equally big honkin’ mass between my legs. I can see you’re aggravated that my right thigh is on my seat and yours, but what can I do? Get a smaller package? You’ll have to ask god about that one. Trust me, it bothers me too, but at the end of the day, there’s not much I can do about it.
You on the other hand, well, maybe you could go to the gym a little more, or drink one less latte in the morning. If you toned up, maybe you could only take up 3/4 or even 1/2 your seat, allowing me and my boys some breathing room. It can’t possibly bother you that much can it? Me, sitting here at 8:30 in the morning, my leg touching yours. It’s kind of nice, isn’t it? Neighborly almost. I mean, I already kind of stopped noticing I was taking up two seats in the first place. Surely, you’ve forgotten too.
8 years late, 3 Fare Inspectors Surplus
Photo by Troy Holden
For the first time in memory there were fare inspectors at the O’Farrell and Van Ness (38 outbound) stop last night. I applaud this attempt. Again, this is the first time I recall ever seeing inspectors there and I have been taking the bus home from work (where I get on at O’Farrell and Van Ness) for nearly 8 years. But there was not just one inspector, or two…there were four (4) inspectors. I was so overwhelmed at the show of force I asked one of them if they were all ‘working’. Yes, they were all working, as I witnessed when the bus approached. Does it really take four inspectors to make sure everybody pays? I would think one would do the trick. Heck, you don’t need inspectors if the bus drivers did their job and not allow people to enter the back of the bus. I just returned from Vancouver where I saw a bus driver physically get up and walk to the back of the bus to boot somebody off for entering through the back and not paying.
With Muni’s budget woes there is a need to make better use of the money and services already there. Collecting every fare is one step. Cutting back on unnecessary expenses another.
Photo by Flickr user james94103.
This diary came to the Muni Diaries Gmail inbox from Kevin Adler. If you’ve got Muni or BART stories, gripes, or transit news tips, you can email us or submit stories here.
A Brief Exchange on BART
The following is by Devin
16th and Mission BART, about 5 p.m. on the second-hottest afternoon in recent memory. Agitated Man standing on landing of the east-entrance stairway eating a hamburger out of a McDonald’s bag and intermittently barking Spanish into a cellphone.
Commuter Woman in Skirt passes Agitated Latino Man. Moments later, Agitated Man is throwing hamburger buns at Commuter Woman in Skirt, screaming largely unintelligible remark ending (mundanely) in “comida.” Commuter Woman in Skirt looks annoyed & slightly threatened, but not overly upset (probably because he missed), proceeds down into station.
Moments later, McDonald’s food mostly consumed, Agitated Man gradually starts heading up stairs, passes Irritable Man with Dog. Agitated Latino Man stops to feed rest of hamburger to Dog. Dog, amenable, stops, eats hamburger. Irritable Man screams at Agitated Man (and/or Dog; wording was ambiguous), waves leash. Agitated Man proceeds back up stairs at accelerated pace, groping for cellphone.
Dog, detecting no further hamburger availability, follows Irritable Man into station. Curtain descends.
Photo by Flickr user canadianlookin.
Write us your own Muni or BART vignette —all characters welcome.
38 Geary Drops Lots of Motor Oil on Geary This P.M. (w/update)
Update: First, our bad. Jim is the Jim of the estimable SF Citizen blog. Next, according to Jim, this happened 3355 Geary in front of Mel’s Drive-In at around 1:05 p.m.
Original post: Muni rider Jim Herd sent us these photos of a Muni bus dumping what looks like an awful lot of motor oil on Geary this afternoon. Yikes, especially in this hot weather…anybody else see this? Or do we have to wait to read about it in those new SFMTA incident reports?
Thanks, Jim!
If you’ve got your camera lens trained on any Muni happenings, be sure to send some pics our way. You can also email us at muni.diaries.sf@gmail.com.
J-Church Newbies
Ileana at Bored is the New Busy sent over a diary on the J during the Chinese New Year Parade earlier in the year:
I’m on the outbound J, my second favorite train because it comes second closest to my house. I got on at Powell St. station along with a pile of others leaving the Chinese New Year Parade. The crush of bodies boarding the double-time procession of train cars heading anywhere-but-here is unusually dense and unusually overwhelming. We all feel it. We take shallow breaths, inching closer to the edge of the platform, filling one car after another.
Approaching: Outbound K, followed by 2-carNN, followed by one-car J.
The doors on the K open, no one gets off; no one can get on; the doors close. We wait, hope that the NN has room.
A woman in hospital-issue slipper socks squeezes through with the aid of a walker, mumbling, “Why do I bother? What’s the point? Why don’t you all go back to goddamn China? We don’t need your goddamn parade! It’s like I’m not even a citizen in my own country! I can’t even get on my own goddamn train because of you people. You go back to China. You go back to China, all of you! Taking away my rights as a citizen.”