Muni Mind Reader: The Tweaker

I Lost Me to MethThe latest installment in Tiffany Maleshefski’s Muni Mind Reader series peers inside the mental machinations of the so-called tweaker. This is someone we’ve all seen on the bus or on the street and probably tried to ignore. But hey, they’re people too.

Hellloooo fellow bus passengers! Hello! Hi. Hi there. Is that a baby? Is this your baby? HI BABY!!! You like coffee, huh? I HATE YOU. Why is everyone looking at me? HEY DRIVER! IS THIS MY STOP? What is Gavin Newsom doing anyway? DRIVER! Give me my transfer. Yes, I paid you. OKAY FINE! I don’t know why everyone picks on me. Sigh.

Yes! I am the tweaker!

I go from low to high

And I’ll be tweakin’ till the day I die

I was just singing The Who. You know, The Who? Never mind.

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Playboys and Boys Playing …

playboy on the subway

This delightful tale is by Amy

Ok, so apparently it’s Gross on BART week, although I don’t remember seeing a press release. (Sorry, I didn’t snap any pictures).

On the way home yesterday, this guy with a beard and baseball cap was reading Playboy on BART. A group of middle-aged women, noticing this, got up quickly and scattered like he was contagious or something. One of them said, quite loudly, “I GUESS HE’S READING IT FOR THE ARTICLES.”

Bearded guy, clearly only slightly embarrassed, folded the magazine cover over and continued to look at it.

But what I saw this morning will stick with me for a month, at least.

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Creative punishment for fare-jumping?

MUSTI don’t know about you, but I can appreciate a certain level of honesty with some things, including breaking the law. Especially if you get caught. (“Ah. Yes, officer, I know how fast I was going. Very fast, indeed”.)  By the same token, I also appreciate subtle, off-script ways of punishing people for doing so.

Fare jumpers often seem more nonchalant than anything else. They keep their heads down as they wrench those back doors open by their fingernails, and generally don’t say much or cause a ruckus while they’re trying not to get squished in the doorway.

This gal on a 10-Townsend one afternoon put them all to shame.

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Muni Diaries Live: Riders With Drinks at the Make-Out Room!

#048: Jun

Did you know Muni Diaries is best enjoyed with a live audience, accompanied by a beer or cocktail? Come join us for Muni Diaries’ first ever Riders With Drinks event at the Make-Out Room on Friday, June 12.

In the fine tradition of spoken word, your fellow Muni riders will read their stories, recite Muni-related haikus, re-enact some funny Muni scenes (finger puppets, anyone?), and everything in between. The idea is to tell Muni stories in whatever form that inspires you, so if you’ve got a Muni tale to share, or music, art, photography, or video inspired by Muni and would like to join the lineup, email us asap!

By the way, we are one of the main events at the Make-Out Room that night, which means our name will be on the big sign outside! Can you tell we’re really excited?

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