Not-Too-Loud American Seeks French Disciplinarian

BUS ETIQUETTE
Photo by Flickr user Lulu Vision

Allie has a strange missed connection of sorts. Read on.

One of my friends and I have seen the same woman riding the 31 and 5 off and on since we moved to San Francisco five years ago to attend USF. We call her the French Woman. She has a French accent, seriously dislikes cell phones, and will tell you off if you are speaking or laughing too loud (by too loud, I mean louder than a whisper). Like… seriously tell you off.

Regardless of the day of the week, she will exclaim across the bus, “It is Sunday, a day of rest! Do not talk so loud!”

We hadn’t seen her in a long time until last week when we were disembarking from the 5 at Baker and she was waiting at the stop… Let’s just say I got a very stern look and lots of hand motions which insinuated that I was being loud and obnoxious. But I was outside and laughing (soberly and not super loud) around noon on a Saturday. Has anyone else run into this librarian-like French woman?

North Beach Muni Riders Win OK Go Concert

For the last two months you’ve seen the Yahoo! Bus Stop Derby games all over town, pitting neighborhoods against one another for a free OK Go concert. We even tested out the game and pitched a few points for the Mission and Pac Heights. Alas, we were no match for the fierce bus riders waiting in North Beach, who edged out all the other ‘hoods to win a free concert this Saturday at the SF Art Institute (800 Chestnut Street).

From the folks at Yahoo! Bus Stop Derby:

The entire city is invited to rock out on the rooftop at the SF Art Institute, from the toughest competition (Mission and Tenderloin—so close!) to the slightly less tough (Noe Valley, thanks for playing). Come enjoy a variety of street food, games, and mingle with your fellow neighbors on February 5, starting at 3:30pm. Concert doors open at 5:30pm—but come early, since only the first 800 people will get wristbands to the show.

P.S. Take the bus. Parking at the block party is very limited so hop on the Muni (nearby lines: 45 Union/Stockton, 30 Stockton, and 41 Union) or ride your bike.

Will there be treadmills or puppies on stage with OK Go, or will the band incorporate some Muni antics into the show? Only one way to find out!

(Hat tip: FunCheapSF.com)

Spotless Spotted on the 49 (not sarcastic)

My 49-Van Ness/Mission stories aren’t usually gross. The bus is often loud, grungy, full, and kept at varying degrees of warm and musty. But not every evening commute comes with a possible urine river in close proximity.

But, for the first time in nearly three years, I found a spotless 49. Sort of. See the photo I snapped above.

This is the only picture I shot. But every panel within view was just as clean.

A lot of, if not all, of these window-panel thingies was clearly new. Sitting next to one was almost like using a brand-new shopping cart. Or using the new gym shower.

Important note: the rest of the bus was not spotless. There was still some crap on the floor. Poles bestickered, as usual.  The windows themselves were clearly not new. It being an articulated 49, the bus was obviously not new, either.

But the panels, folks. Spotless! One step at a time.

Empty Muni bus rams into light pole, fire hydrant (updates)

Update (11:39 a.m.): The Examiner now reports that the incident is being chalked up to “employee errors.”

Update (10:51 a.m.): According to the SF Examiner, the bus was completely unattended (no driver). MTA is still looking into how this happened.

Original post: Muni rider Paul alerts us to an unfortunate incident that happened at O’Farrell and Van Ness this morning. @ActionNewsSF says no passengers were on board. The marquee looks to read as much. We’ll do our best to find out what happened, and the condition of the driver.

Here’s an image from @tvham:

Wine-box camaraderie on BART

200408 bart
Photo by superciliousness

It was Friday, so of course I was headed downtown with an unlabeled box containing six bottles of wine. I was going to meet my wife and a good friend at, yes, a wine bar. The bottles belonged to the friend — her last shipment from a wine club she belongs to. Long story, not important.

It was a rather self-conscious walk down Valencia to the 16th St. BART station, mostly because of the weight and awkwardness of the wine box. But I’m no complainer — I just walked with an ounce of extra-awareness the whole way.

When I got to the platform at 16th St., the next train was still about 2 or 3 minutes away, so I decided to give my arms and shoulders a short break. I set the box down. And when I did, the faintest “clink” emerged. It was the loudest, shortest sound ever emitted anywhere in the universe.

A woman standing a few feet away looked over, and without my looking back at her, said, “I heard that!” At that point, it could’ve gone any number of ways. But here’s how it went instead:

I replied, “Oh, haha. But how do you know what it is?” (Remember: The box wasn’t labeled.)

“I just came from a wine and cheese at work,” she said. “I know that sound when I hear it.” She laughed.

“Okay, okay, you got me,” I said. She made a joke about giving her a bottle, but I decided to change the subject.

“A coworker told me recently about a method of opening wine bottles without using a corkscrew. It’s involves 1) being French, 2) being drunk, 3) taking the foil off, placing the bottom of the bottle in an empty shoe, and beating it repeatedly against the wall. The cork inches its way out of the bottle until eventually, voila! You’ve got a bottle of de-corked wine” (here a video demonstration … but alas, I digress.)

The train came. We kept talking, but sat in different rows.

When my stop (Powell) came, I got up to walk toward the door. She smiled at me. I told her that, next time I see her and I’m carrying wine, I’ll give her a bottle. And I’m totally serious.

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