Category: Funny: Muni LOLs

Three poets battled in a dark alley in the Mission for the right to go head-to-head with the current Muni Haiku Battle champion, Baruch Porras-Hernandez. And that battle was fierce! Tirumari Jothi, Chris Collision, and Alexandria Love busted out their best 5-7-5 poetry about public transit, and our audience judges chose Alexandria Love as our next challenger!

You can see Alexandria’s fight for the haiku crown at the next Muni Diaries Live Saturday, Nov. 4, and the Elbo Room. Tickets are on sale now, so grab one before they are all gone.

To tide you over between now and the show, here are some of the best Muni haikus from Tirumari Jothi:

Blowjob in car; that’s
Road head, right? So then, handjob on
MUNI; a track jack

I get on the train
One seat is open, but wait
Is that…human shit?

(May we advice that you issue a friendly warning like this?)

One more:

One time, I threw up
In my mouth, cuz I was hung-
over. I swallowed.

From challenger Chris Collision of I Don’t Even Own a Television:

On my way to work.
Fuck, dude, I’m wearing headphones!
Stop. Talking. To me.

One more from Chris:

I know you feel me.
The problem is, I smell you.
Standing room only.

And one from our Facebook page by Joy Morgenstern:

Manspreader on left
Negligent bather on right
Welcome to Muni

Be there for the Alexandria vs. Baruch showdown, and hear more only-in-SF stories at the show next Saturday.

Muni Diaries Live

Saturday, Nov 4, 2017

Doors: 6 p.m., show: 7 p.m.

Elbo Room (Tickets)

647 Valencia Street, San Francisco

Take Muni there: J-Church, 12, 14, 22, 33, 49, or BART: 16th or 24th St. stations

 

Photo by @hoobyjuice

For the third year, Muni will turn its buses into mobile galleries for local artists—and you get to vote for the art you’ll see on your ride. Voting for the third annual Muni Art contest (organized by the nonprofit San Francisco Beautiful and the SFMTA) opens today and runs through the next month. You can cast your vote here.

The 2018 theme is “The Art of Poetry in San Francisco,” and artists are using local poets to inspire their submission.

We loved the variety of styles by last year’s winning artists, and this year’s art selection also reflects a diversity of style and inspiration, like “Drawn to You” by Meli, above.

Only Bay Area artists were eligible to submit applications for the Muni Art contest. Here are the 10 semi-finalists:

Cha Diaz (San Mateo County)
David Carroll (San Francisco County)
Donavon Brutus (San Francisco County)
Janet Rumsey (San Francisco County)
Lam Giang (Alameda County)
Mara Hernandez (Alameda County)
Matthew O’Brien (San Francisco County)
Meli Burgueno (San Francisco County)
Randi Pace (San Francisco County)
Tsungwei Moo (San Francisco County)

SF Beautiful explains how the contest works:

The five artists with the most votes will each have their art displayed on Muni buses this fall alongside five pre-selected
poems from local, Bay Area poets. The new element of poetry is a contribution from Poetry in Motion, a division of the Poetry
Society of America that places poetry on public transit systems across the country. In addition to having their art displayed on
buses, the artist who receives the most votes will be awarded $2,000 and each of the remaining four will be awarded $1,250.

SF Beautiful tells us that there will be a total of 100 buses displaying the art work. Yay for local art and poetry!

Don’t forget to cast your vote here.