Eugenia Chien has been eavesdropping on the 47, 49, or 1 lines since the mid-90's. She lives by the adage, "Anything can happen on Muni" (and also, "That's not water.")

Ideas to Make Muni Better

Robin Williams
Photo by Ron Henry

Rider Jules had some ideas to improve Muni rides that we think are worth mentioning:

Big ideas for Muni buses from Jules:

Recruit Robin Williams do all the regular messages, in varying voices. Imagine his funny take on “Please move to the back of the bus,” it might just get people to listen, and god forbid, smile…He could consider adding these messages: “Please do not stand in front of a door unless you’re getting off at the next stop” and “Why stand when you can sit?”

Try softer lighting in a couple of buses, maybe a different glow will relax everyone more.

Got other quirky ideas to improve the ride?

How not to get jacked in the back of the bus

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Photo by Yesica

Two people at the SOMArts exhibit of I Live Here: SF had back-of-the-bus tales to share:

A group of happy-go-lucky teens jumped onto the bus and then realized that some of them needed money to complete their journey. They walked over and asked me for a buck or two — I complied, having been in that predicament myself before. A second teenager asked me for more change for his friend. “No luck,” I replied. I didn’t have any more change. Then I blurted out, “Hey man, I just gave you two bucks!” I had a big grin on my face because I was impressed by their preseverance.

They grinned in response and said, “We could jack you. But you’re nice so we’re not going to jack you.”

We all laughed and I learned again that it pays to be nice. At least on Muni.

This one’s from Christine:

While riding the J, I noticed that a man behind me reeked of cigarette smoke. That wasn’t unusual, but it started getting stronger. Finally, I heard another passenger say, “Ok, we all sat here while you smoked the first one, but that’s enough!”

I turned around just as the guy crushed out his second cigarette.

Reminds us of one of the first diaries not written by us: Rob’s story from July 2008 of breaking all the rules on Muni.

And the Great Muni bus shelter goes to …

Muni shelter at SOMArts

A bus shelter turned into public art? Next time you see a bus stop, think again: this may very well be in our near future.

In internet time, it seems like forever ago when we were looking for someone to give a 30-Stockton bus shelter a good home. Thanks to the generosity of SFMTA, the bus stop has been a fun addition to Julie Michelle’s I Live Here: SF exhibit at SOMArts. Last week you voted for who gets to take the beast home, and the winner, receiving 1,616 votes, is Michael Burstein. He has been rumored to have changed Bush Street to Obama Street, installed swings on BART, and placed mistletoe throughout the city last Christmas, among other things.

Michael has said that the bus shelter should be “public art” and promised to use it for something “whimsical, interactive, and possibly flammable.” Interesting! Thank you to everyone who participated in the poll. We’ll keep you updated on what happens to the bus stop.

All the enthusiasm for the bus shelter only made us realize once again how much public transportation is a part of our daily lives. If you spotted something funny on Muni or overheard a conversation that made you think, share it here with your fellow riders. Let’s blow up the party talk!

I Live Here: SF, Muni Edition

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All photos by Julie Michelle

Julie Michelle’s I Live Here: SF exhibit closes tonight at SOMArts. Many of Julie’s portrait subjects mention Muni in their stories, proving once again that public transportation is an essential fabric of living in San Francisco. You can’t really describe living here without throwing Muni in the mix:

“No day I live here is ever the same. It might be the same Muni train, but there are new characters. It might be the same brunch place, but the stories shared always change. The people I hold dear will always be there, but our roles and relationships are always evolving.” – Kimberly

“The San Francisco I grew up in isn’t the one people imagine from watching reruns of Full House. Ingleside is a working class neighborhood served by the K Muni line. While riding the K along Ocean Avenue, I can spot tired people napping in their business suits, young couples saying goodbye at their stops, and parents reining in their rambunctious kids. While some neighborhoods can be easily pinned down with a few stereotypes, I don’t think I can say the same here.” – Anna

“San Francisco is the cool breath of fog, standing on a street corner cursing at Muni, Monday night Guinness in a North Beach pub.” – Jax

“The young dispatcher I worked with on Sunday mornings told me I should consider urban planning as a vocation, and lent me a copy of Jane Jacobs’ The Death & Life of Great American Cities. He’s a Muni driver now, and I see him occasionally on the system around town. There’s never time to thank him for illuminating my purpose, and I keep meaning to return his copy of the book.” – Megan

“Having lived in major cities for the last 10 years, I was surprised at my initial trepidation about riding the Muni. The 19 and the 47 are my lines. Today, I appreciate them because they get me from here to there and everywhere in between with a little bit of flare, if you will, but in those first few rides I distinctly remember my shoulders at my ears and a look of confused horror that was most assuredly ill-masked by my please-don’t-notice-me-I’m-just-sitting-here-minding-my-own-business face. Thanks, Muni, you really make this town feel like a city.” – Nell.

“Undeniably, we’re also a pretty random town. Each slide of the Muni doors is a theatre-like lottery where two bucks can really change your life. People are almost never what they seem.”  – Chris

“I love how this city whispers all these sweet forevers to my heart… In this city I have experienced the kindness of Muni drivers who allow me to hop on when I do not have enough money to pay the fare. I always think that they allow me to ride for free because they know that I should not be out in the streets that late at night.” – Mayanin

“Now, when people ask where I live, I can hardly contain my pride, my sense of life, when I say San Francisco. There’s nowhere quite like it on earth. From twisting drives up Highway ‘1’ North, with barely a second without a world-class view, to late nights in the Mission. From evenings in a tub overlooking the bay, to friendly heart-warming conversations with complete strangers on the Muni. From the madness of the never-ending stream of street-parties to the calm of the Botanical Gardens – all just a cycle away.” – Tom

These photos are just some of the more than 180 subjects who are featured in this exhibit, presented with art by Chris Rusak and film from Rick Prelinger. Your last chance to see this exhibit is tonight (Tuesday Nov. 30) — we’ll be celebrating from 5-7 p.m. at SOMArts (934 Brannan Street between 8th and 9th Streets). And yes, you’ll find out who will take home the 30-Stockton bus shelter too. See you there!

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After school on the 22.

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A Dispute about air on the 49-Van Ness

bus ride home
Photo by Art Siegel

The 49 arrived after we had all waited 15 minutes in the freezing cold. When we got onto the bus, though, the inside of the bus was about 20 degrees warmer than the outside because it was packed with morning commuters. I was lucky to grab a seat and kept my head down.

The bus was steaming up when a young guy standing in front of me with a long braided ponytail reached over to open the window. But just as soon as he opened the window, the big guy next to him reached over to slam the window shut. Without a word, Pony Tail reached over again to open it. Then Big Guy slammed it shut again. Shit was about to go down.

“Hey what’s wrong with you, I just wanna open the window, dude, get some air,” Pony Tail guy said.

Big Guy murmured something testily.

“Whatchu lookin’ at me like that for? What, no, it’s not cold! It’s hot in here! What? You wanna do this?” Pony Tail shoved a finger into Big Guy’s chest. “You wanna do this?”

Big Guy shoves back at Pony Tail. The older woman sitting next to me yells, “You guys, STOP IT!”

Big Guy stepped up closer to Pony Tail and said something we couldn’t hear, then Pony Tail said loudly, “I was just opening the window, and dude here with his hella BAD BREATH is trying to start shit!”

A young woman sitting behind Pony Tail started laughing, and now Pony Tail had an audience.

“You gonna start something with me, over air? You gonna try to send my ass to jail, because I want some air?” Pony Tail said.

The older woman next to me was not amused. “You should go to jail!” she yells.

Pony Tail wasn’t deterred. “Dude, if this was my stop we would both get off here and we would settle this outside!”

Finally audible, Big Guy said that, actually, this WAS his stop, and that they should indeed get off the bus here together.

“But this isn’t my stop, yo?” Pony Tail protests. “I was saying if this was my stop I would settle it with you!”

Big Guy got off the bus and we all breathed a sigh of relief. Pony Tail continued to talk about how he would have caught a cold or the flu if he hadn’t opened the window to get some fresh air, what with so many people being sick and this is the flu season and everything.

Minutes later, a young woman wearing a white sweater boarded the bus and made her way toward us and Pony Tail.

“Heeeeey girl,” Pony Tail said to the young woman, who clearly didn’t know him.

“I like your number! What is it?”

Muni Diaries is built from your stories from life on the bus. Got a Muni story? Whether it’s audio, video, photographs, or just simple prose, you know the place to share it.

Muni Tales from Andrew Lam

Author Andrew Lam regaled us with some scenes from the bus at Muni Diaries Live last month. If you missed it, we’ve got him on this video clip where he tells stories from the 19-Polk and 47-Van Ness, involving a parrot and a very thirsty cousin. The curtains in the Make-Out Room cast a red light on our videos, but hearing Andrew’s provocative, nearly erotic tales, the lighting only seems appropriate.

Andrew will be reading from his new book, East Eats West, at the Book Passage in the Ferry building in San Francisco on Dec. 7, 6 p.m. to 9 p.m.

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